Staying positive

We have started our Christmas break. The boys will be home from school for 2 weeks. Two whole weeks with all the boys home, I just might lose my mind. I am really trying to stay positive that it will be fun and we can do lots of thing. But it is the first Monday of break and they are at each others throats and the fighting is giving me a head ache. We were going to make cookies but they can't take turns with toys or TV so I doubt baking cookies will work. We have so much snow that it should be fun to play in but it is so cold. Maybe all the new Christmas toys will help.

Hello????

Sorry, another bitch fest. Ryan and Griffin are driving me nuts. Ryan used to have a lot of common sense for a 6 year old. All of a sudden he has none. I think when they go to school and start learning academics they lose their common sense. Must be not enough room in that little skull for all the info. For some reason he thought it would be fine to glue small pieces of wood together on the carpet in the living room...WTF! So I stop him and ask "Do you think that is a good idea?" "No" he says to me. I ask him why. He tells me it would make a mess. So, if he knew that why would he do it. I tell him to go in the kitchen and he proceeds to show me the glue isn't coming out well and what happens...All over the carpet. Again, WTF!! He just told me it would make a mess. I don't know, maybe I expect too much from him.

Then Griffin...Lucky he is cute or I would ship him off. I am up stairs trying to nurse Zachy and lay him down for a nap. He is at the stage when he hears something he has to look so he hasn't been nursing well. I have told the boys not to come into Zachy's room when I am nursing him unless someone is bleeding or the house is on fire. So, Griffin, comes in which I am not thrilled with but he is being quite. Next thing I know he is talking to the dog in the annoying baby voice he uses. I tell him to go down stairs but it is too late, Zachy is up looking around. I still try for the nap and lay him down. After a lot of crying (Zachy not me) I go back upstairs and try to nurse him again. I know (now that I am writing this) it doesn't seem like a big deal but at the time I just was at my limit.

Now Ryan has his friend over (Dillon) who is a very sweet boy. Ryan just has a hard time sharing his friends. It could be a long afternoon. Soon both boys will be on Christmas break for two weeks. I have a feeling it is going to be hard. I will have to schedule a lot of play dates for them.

Now I am off to make lunch.

Blessed

I am sitting here crying my eyes out at a tv show. Brothers and Sisters is a great show. It reminds me of my family. We are large and a little dysfunctional but always love each other and have fun. But in this episode a baby is very sick and needs a liver transplant. It is too hard to watch things like that. I am just so thankful that my kids are healthy. I could not image what it must be like to have a very sick baby. I just want to go upstairs and hold all three of my kids.

On a happier note: It is snowing!!! I just love this time of year. The snow makes everything beautiful. I just hope we get has much as they are calling for.

I had a great time at the knitting party. We did it again last night. It is so much fun, we sit and knit and gab. Just a great time with some ladies that understand me. We bitch about husbands and kids and other moms that make us mad. So far I love knitting! It gives me something to do with my hands when I am nursing the baby or watching a show. But today I can't knit, I should not be on the computer. Jonny is mad because yesterday I didn't get as much housework done as he thought I should. So today I have to get the rest done, just so I don't have to listen to him. Again he brought up the fact that I don't get the housework done even though I don't have daycare kids here. I guess that is what it boils down to. I am not making the money he wants and has to bitch about something. He doesn't understand that I still have our kids to feed and play with and nurse. I have to sit to nurse the baby, and when he isn't feeling well he nurses to comfort himself. I spend a lot of time with him on my boob. I wish the guys could understand that. All he says is "Just don't nurse him so often". Yeah that doesn't fly! Well enough bitching, I have to get my housework done.

Tonight I am off to a knitting party. My friends get together ever Thursday night to knit, talk and eat. This is the first time I am going, hopefully I will learn to knit. I have always wanted to, but just haven't found the time to learn. So I am off tonight and hopefully Jenny can teach me. I must be getting old to be excited about knitting. Oh well.

This is the first time I will be leaving the baby with anyone at bed time. I am leaving him with Jonny, but it might has well be a sitter. Jonny has never put the baby to bed. He is 8 months old today. Pretty sad his father hasn't done it yet. I will try to put him down before I leave but that is a little early. I bet I will get a call as soon as I get to Jenny's. Maybe I will have Courtney on back up so I can get out of the house for a little while (without children). Its funny, when I see someone out and about, they don't recognize me unless I have the kids. I can't tell you how many times that has happen. I always hear "I didn't know it was you without a baby on your hip or a child hanging off your arms". I think it is time I go out without any of them.

Cuddles

I am just sitting with Zachy asleep on my lap. This is one of the most wonderful things about being mom. Just holding my wonderful baby. I sit here breathing him in. I am sure it must sound odd, but the "smell" of my children just calms me. I love to feel their warm, smell that baby smell, and hear their breathing. It is really a blessing!

The kids and I had a wonderful day. We went to the grocery store and the mall. Everyone behaved wonderfully. It makes me feel good and proud that my kids can be so well behaved. Because sometimes it is just the opposite.

"good boy"

It has been a while since my last entry. I am just terrible about staying current on anything. That includes laundry, dishes and general housekeeping. Jonny (my husband) is usually pretty good at going these things when I slack off, but why does he need a pat on the back, the good boy, great job and thank you every time he does something. I don't get anything from him when I do it, and I get so mad to think it is because these things are viewed as "my job". I have never gotten at thank you from him for keeping the kids feed, clothed, cleaned and safe every day. For playing endless rounds of Candyland and trucks so that they don't bother him. I am sorry, I might just be tired, because I am the one that gets up with all three kids, while he snores on.

On a lighter note...I am so Thankful for everything I have. My kids are wonderful and healthy, my family was all together for Thanksgiving, and I have the best time being able to volunteer at the kids school. For that I have to thank my husband. He really has done everything to make it possible for me to not have to work. So, I guess I can suck it up and pat him on the back when he does the dished "for me" as he likes to put it.